I experienced a burnout so deep that I had real trouble connecting to the things that mattered to me in life. At that moment, I knew things had to change. I knew that the constant striving and trying to be everything for everyone, presenting the perfect persona, and denying myself what I really wanted was not serving me. All my life I had played by the book.

I realized that I was trying to live the professional life that was set up by the leaders who came before me. Leaders who were brought up in the patriarchal system were dictating not only the style of leadership that was appropriate but also the expectations I held myself to. I was succeeding in the world by aligning myself with a system that was not designed for me. A world that was designed by the patriarchal world culture to fit the ideals they believed led to success. A world women had been trying to fit themselves into for generations. Trying to prove themselves by succeeding in the same way men have, because that was the system laid out before us. Not surprisingly, women have risen to the task and shown how competent, intelligent, resourceful, and strong we really are. We have fit in by molding ourselves to the cultural norms that have been set before us. And like trying to fit our Stepsister feet into Cinderella’s shoes, we have cut off vital parts of ourselves. And in doing so, we have lost ourselves.